Shine on diamond eyes...

Its the second night that I have had this dream, my cell rings, its the middle of the night and it's my father, and at that second I know something is wrong but I never get to find out what it is because I wake up gasping for air...

Any ways I was up till 4 I can never sleep.
Your eyes are haunting me.
There are days I just want to be in your arms and never leave them.
You seem to take all of the pain away.
I miss just laying with you and the dog and not having to say anything.
I always talk about you in this thing.

Ashlee: I don't know what I would do without you, your there when things get crazy, and when I just need to talk to someone. I really hope that I get to start in the fall with you. I can't wait to see you! YAY! I am sure we are going to have some crazy times.

more to come later.

"Your the MVP of heartbreak"

reading too much into things? you tell me?

So I am sitting here talking to Lee.
I thank god for her everyday she is the one true person that I could talk to and tell her everything.
Gosh, the one boy that makes me weak in the knees that I can't wait to see, I would love nothing more then to hate you.
I realize that I sound/write like you, act like you, dress like you, hell I was even asked if I worked for you.
The words you say I feel like some of them were towards me and then other times they are about others, but either way I read into it and it hurts at times.
I miss you.
I need you.
And as sad as it sounds to me, you, or anyone eles I do love you, even if we are just two fucked up people trying to find our place.
Help me out here.
I want to know where I stand.
If you don't want me around let me know because dragging me around will hurt.
I am so confused.
I am lost.
Someone please help me find my way.