Four words to choke on.....

You ever find yourself floating away from someone you're talking to? Like, you can see them forming words with their mouth, but for the life of you, you can't hear them. Or maybe you can, but it's in a different language. You stop talking because you don't remember what you were talking about in the first place.


Your brain shuts down. A movie comes on. It's very slow and it always catches you by surprise. This unnamed feeling comes over you as you watch yourself as a child. In your head the movie plays a small clip of something you can't ever forget. So you sit there, unable to communicate to the person before you, for you can't see them anyway. Only the movie.


A child runs in the backyard. It's you. You're chasing you're dog. You're laughing. A somber smile finds your lips as you watch yourself play. At first you feel the joy of that precious childhood moment. And then you remember that moment. Then you realize it was the last time you felt that kind of joy. That innocence. That freedom. That blissful ignorance of the hateful world around you. You were a child. You were happy. You were carefree. Your soul will never forget that fire of childlike innocence. Memories. Close and distant.


Now you feel that yearning. When that movie plays in all of us, the past is the present. This is everyone's movie. There is no 'snapping out of your thoughts'. Only a gradual fading of emotions. Emotions that had paralyzed your entire being so you could watch this movie again. Now you can speak. Now you can hear that someone is talking to you. Maybe you interrupt them, or maybe you don't. But we all say the same thing.